University of pittsburgh acceptance rate

Hello there!
​
Thanks for taking the time to read my post. I'm a 38-year-old programmer from a small town in the Netherlands. I've tried this before and had some nice conversations, but in the end it didn't work out so I'm back to give this another try.
​
When I'm not working, I love reading fantasy books, collecting books, playing video games on my PC, and going on long walks in nature. I'm also fascinated by ancient cultures and mythology, which is why I enjoy traveling to see ancient sites in person.
I'm an introvert (INTJ) who loves pets, but I don't currently have any. I'm also childfree and left-leaning politically. I've been doing volunteer work for over 20 years, and I'm an atheist. Plus, I don't smoke, drink alcohol, or do drugs.
I'll admit, I'm not the best at small talk, but I make up for it by being a great listener and advice giver. I've been told that I have a funny but dry sense of humor. Although I struggle with dysthymia, it's not enough to keep me from functioning in my day-to-day life.
I'm working on my weight and getting to a healthy level again, but I'm not there yet. I also don't enjoy going out to bars, clubs, or partying, but I do enjoy going out to eat at a restaurant or going to a concert.
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What am I looking for? Well, I'm looking for a serious monogamous relationship with someone who shares some of my interests and hobbies. I'm looking for someone who is intelligent, childfree, left-leaning politically, and below 40 (roughly). Most importantly, I'm looking for someone who will accept me for who I am, flaws and all.
​
So if you're someone who puts as much effort into having and keeping up a conversation as I do, and you believe that we could make each other's lives better by being together, I'd love to hear from you. Let's get to know each other and see where things go.

Hello there!
​
Thanks for taking the time to read my post. I'm a 38-year-old programmer from a small town in the Netherlands. I've tried this before and had some nice conversations, but in the end it didn't work out so I'm back to give this another try.
​
When I'm not working, I love reading fantasy books, collecting books, playing video games on my PC, and going on long walks in nature. I'm also fascinated by ancient cultures and mythology, which is why I enjoy traveling to see ancient sites in person.
I'm an introvert (INTJ) who loves pets, but I don't currently have any. I'm also childfree and left-leaning politically. I've been doing volunteer work for over 20 years, and I'm an atheist. Plus, I don't smoke, drink alcohol, or do drugs.
I'll admit, I'm not the best at small talk, but I make up for it by being a great listener and advice giver. I've been told that I have a funny but dry sense of humor. Although I struggle with dysthymia, it's not enough to keep me from functioning in my day-to-day life.
I'm working on my weight and getting to a healthy level again, but I'm not there yet. I also don't enjoy going out to bars, clubs, or partying, but I do enjoy going out to eat at a restaurant or going to a concert.
​
What am I looking for? Well, I'm looking for a serious monogamous relationship with someone who shares some of my interests and hobbies. I'm looking for someone who is intelligent, childfree, left-leaning politically, and below 40 (roughly). Most importantly, I'm looking for someone who will accept me for who I am, flaws and all.
​
So if you're someone who puts as much effort into having and keeping up a conversation as I do, and you believe that we could make each other's lives better by being together, I'd love to hear from you. Let's get to know each other and see where things go.

The cost of additions (we were quoted $265-350/sq ft for a ground level primary suite addition) just seem to make the whole concept untenable. For an extra $150,000+, the cost of adding a 500 sq ft primary suite, I can probably find a house that offers more than just an additional nice bedroom/bathroom.
Of course, the benefit to a reno is we get to keep our low interest rate on our mortgage, our neighborhood, etc.
When are people finding that doing an addition makes sense in today’s world/market?
(For additional context - we have a 3 bed 2 bath house, 2050 sq ft, with a 4th partially finished “bonus room” that we’d likely finish to a bedroom/office. Also has a downstairs den. House is in a nice older family-friendly neighborhood with good school, a couple blocks from our town’s biggest park, etc.)

So, I have to admit, I'm a huge IT Crowd fan. I haven't rewatched the show in a while (and am not really planning to after learning about the opinions of its creator), but I've probably seen every episode at least a dozen times. I think it's one of the funniest shows ever made.
Of course there is a bunch of uncomfortable content in there. Outdated jokes or jokes that were never really funny in the first place. Stuff I always cringed at but just ignored for the really good jokes in that show.
But what I want to talk about here is that one IT Crowd episode, the one that always gets brought up whenever the topic comes to transphobic episodes in sitcoms. Brief summary: One character (Douglas) starts dating a woman (April), she confesses to him that she's trans, he doesn't care, they have a great relationship, the topic comes up again and it is revealed that he misunderstood her the first time, it actually is a big deal and they end up in a fist fight that destroys the internet.
Is that episode transphobic? Without a doubt. Douglas accepting her being trans is played for laughs. April is portrayed basically as a man in a sexy woman's body. The fight at the end is portrayed as justified by her being trans.
But I first watched that episode as a young teen, before I realized I was trans and before I knew enough to really pick up on the transphobia in that episode. All I saw was a beautiful and confident trans woman, a happy relationship between a cis man and a trans woman, and an idiot cis man who then throws that away for basically no reason in the end. I came away from that episode with a much more positive view of trans women than I had come in with and for a long time, I didn't think anything negative of that episode at all, though that changed during later rewatches when I picked up on the intent of the episode.
Anyway, I don't really have a point here. I'm not defending that episode or its creator. I guess I just find it interesting that I managed to watch this transphobic piece of media and come away with something positive. Has anyone else had similar experiences with this or some other movie or TV show episode? I'd be curious to know.

Hello there!
​
Thanks for taking the time to read my post. I'm a 38-year-old programmer from a small town in the Netherlands. I've tried this before and had some nice conversations, but in the end it didn't work out so I'm back to give this another try.
​
When I'm not working, I love reading fantasy books, collecting books, playing video games on my PC, and going on long walks in nature. I'm also fascinated by ancient cultures and mythology, which is why I enjoy traveling to see ancient sites in person.
I'm an introvert (INTJ) who loves pets, but I don't currently have any. I'm also childfree and left-leaning politically. I've been doing volunteer work for over 20 years, and I'm an atheist. Plus, I don't smoke, drink alcohol, or do drugs.
I'll admit, I'm not the best at small talk, but I make up for it by being a great listener and advice giver. I've been told that I have a funny but dry sense of humor. Although I struggle with dysthymia, it's not enough to keep me from functioning in my day-to-day life.
I'm working on my weight and getting to a healthy level again, but I'm not there yet. I also don't enjoy going out to bars, clubs, or partying, but I do enjoy going out to eat at a restaurant or going to a concert.
​
What am I looking for? Well, I'm looking for a serious monogamous relationship with someone who shares some of my interests and hobbies. I'm looking for someone who is intelligent, childfree, left-leaning politically, and below 40 (roughly). Most importantly, I'm looking for someone who will accept me for who I am, flaws and all.
​
So if you're someone who puts as much effort into having and keeping up a conversation as I do, and you believe that we could make each other's lives better by being together, I'd love to hear from you. Let's get to know each other and see where things go.

You’ve helped me understand this pain I’ve never been quite able to name or make sense of. I understood the obvious childhood trauma. But I didn’t understand how the trauma-informed decisions I made as a teenager traumatized me further.
And now I see that I’ve been living as if I’ve needed to atone for something my entire adult life. Spent my entire adult life telling myself that my family did the best they could and that I was the one who needed to set things right by being the best (most socially acceptable) version of me I could be. But I don’t need to atone for anything. And the person I need to focus on forgiving is me.
My dream career might not pan at this point (though there’s still a chance). But truth be told, I’m not even sure it’s really my dream. Now it’s time to prioritize health and rest. Not status-seeking to fill the void. Survival mode is exhausting and I’m trying to find out how to actually thrive.
I’m not lazy and hedonistic. I’m exhausted and seeking comfort.
Thanks for reading.

Hi, I’ve applied to TU Delft as an International student, currently studying the IB Diploma. I have a predicted score of 40/45. I’m getting anxious because I haven’t received an acceptance from a college yet. The scores that I submitted to TU Delft were in the 37-40 range and I’d say I performed alright/well on the academic test. What are my chances of getting in?

My offer was accepted over better offers by investors because the seller wanted someone who wanted to actually live there. I’m so so grateful. And now I’m worried I messed it up. My attorney didn’t want me to put the $36,000 down payment right away and told me I had to switch it to a $5,000 good faith deposit. I didn’t really understand why, but his tone was really condescending like I had to do what he said so I agreed to it. The sellers agent was really upset that our attorney changed it and we could lose the deal because of it. We are completely ok with paying it up front! We had no idea it would be such and issue! Panicking because it’s the weekend and there’s nothing we can do. Going to reach out Monday asap and ask them to change it back. If they don’t can I just get a new lawyer asap?

Bro. I can play a 30 minute match, with finishers out the ass, weapons, tables, all sorts of shit. Both of us basically dead weight. And then the match ends and the viewers give it a fucking “ disappointing “ rating. How do i increase my rating if giving the most electrifying match I’ve ever l played is just “ disappointing “.

I'm considering buying the CYMA AK Drum Mag for my CM.048M, purely because it looks cool and I wouldn't mind hosing people down with no thoughts about ammo conservation. I'm not really bothered by the inevitable noise of running around with 2500 BBs, or the added weight because that's all part of the fun.
I am aware however that they, like all things, eventually break down and can throw some issues at you. I'm still relatively new to airsoft, so have next to no experience with fixing guns or mags or anything really. I'd be willing to learn, but I don't see the point if it's gonna die on me every few thousand shots.
I've also heard about feeding issues with some drum mags, where the mag can't keep up with the fire rate of the gun.
So the bottomline is: are Drum Mags worth the hassle, or should I just cop some more normal mags?

[And the latest in the series of Nowhere Pub tales. This one is, IMHO, some of the best prose I've ever managed to write. I'm extremely proud of this one.]
-----------------------------------------
In a shadowy alcove in a darkened and dimly lit pub, a humanoid figure sits at a small table and holds his wineglass by the stem. He tips the empty glass first one way and then the other as he contemplates the small flickering light which rests in the center of the table. This light, as with all the others in the pub is not a candle and he has never understood what it is, nor has he inquired as to its nature. It simply exists, as does the table he sits at, the chair he rests upon, the wineglass he holds and even the pub itself.
As too, does he — simply existing. He acknowledges he is an anomaly. By all that is “right” in his world, he should not exist and, indeed, many of his fellows have had their existence terminated by those who hunt them.
Leaning forward, he places the wineglass on the table and grasps the dark bottle resting next to it. He attempts to pour from the bottle, but only the final few drops of the dark red liquid inside drip into the glass, barely splashing as they strike the bottom. In a vain attempt to extract the last few whispers of what remained, he upends the bottle, suspending it above his wineglass. This produces nothing further, so he returns it to the table pondering if he must continue to stay hidden away here in this pub, or if it is again safe for him to return home.
There are no displayed keepers of time anywhere in the darkened interior, not that they would be visible even if they were. He has a vaguely uneasy sense that time perhaps does not pass equally for all patrons of this place, but, as with the flickering light, has never asked.
With a small sigh, his fingers trace along the fine gold chain which secures his pocket watch to his vest, where it sits nestled inside his left pocket. His cloak remains clasped around his neck and his hand brushes it aside as he does. With a practiced gesture, he tugs it out and flips the lid open, staring at it as if in disbelief.
Another small sigh, followed by him murmuring, “Still four hours until sundown. Guess it’s another bottle, then.”
Before rising, he unclasps his cloak, shrugging it off and letting it fall to rest on the back of his chair. As he stands, he gazes around, looking at the rest of the pub beyond the bare walls of this lonely alcove. He’s seen it over and over again, repeatedly and unchanging through … has it been enough decades to be over a century now? More? The years come and go and eventually pass even beyond memory. The only features which ever change here are those of the clientele.
The Bartender, too, in his own way, seems to be unchanging. Occasionally, the face and the voice of the man standing behind the bar changes, but the personality remains. So, too, do the habitual actions of that person — the towel either tossed nonchalantly over one shoulder or tucked into a belt of some sort — and the semi-continuous polishing of the various glassware. Through his years (decades? centuries?) of patronage, he can’t recall that many glasses or mugs ever being used, but he assumes, as with many other aspects of this pub, it must be so at some time or another, else why the effort?
He stands, taking the bottle with him, and walks the short distance to the bar. As he does, the Bartender looks up from his task of polishing what must be a particularly troublesome spot on another wineglass and sets the glass down in anticipation of needing to attend to a request.
Placing the bottle on the bar, he smiles politely at the Bartender. This pub is one of the few places where he is allowed to smile without the typical response of shrieks of horror, combined, of course, with everyone around him recoiling in terror at what he is. The fangs, while compact, are too distinctive of he and his kind, if any others like him even still remain.
“Another bottle, Lord Carven? I believe I still have several of that vintage if you’d like? Or, perhaps, I think there is a sanguine sherry, Lantegloss ‘210, which you might also enjoy? The grapes are crushed in tubs by nubile females with barbs strewn on the floor of the tub — it is part of some sacred ritualistic process they’ve used for centuries. I suspect that may also appeal to you?”
No matter how many times he had been here, nor his declaration that he could be addressed informally, the Bartender was always most proper in speaking to him, calling him “Marquess” when he would enter and then “Lord”, for the rest of his visit. Over time, he had come to accept that this, too, was a common quirk among the changing faces.
“That sounds pleasant. Shall I fetch my glass to replace it for the new bottle?”
“No need, sir. I’ll provide a new one and I can handle cleaning it all up when I close.”
To the best of the man’s knowledge, he had never known the pub to be closed at any time for any reason, but, again, it was something never to be explained or enquired about.
# # #
The Bartender turned and reached under the bar to open a cabinet, extracting the suggested bottle. He held it up for a thorough examination, turning it first one way and then another, peering deeply inside. “Good, good… it’s remained thoroughly blended. Have to be certain. If there’s any separation or sediment, it means the bottle has been defiled and gone bad. Then I’ve got to fill out a stack of forms and send it back to the vineyard for repurification prior to the proper burial rituals.” This was said with the barest hint of a smile touching the corners of his eyes.
With the explanation and his inspection complete, he extracted a cork puller from the pocket of his half-apron and pushed the cover off with his thumb. The two prongs caught a flicker of light and gleamed for just a moment, as if ready to bite into the neck of the bottle and remove the cork, almost as a gentle reminder to Carven of his own fangs. “And, of course, it would be an insult to a bottle of wine, any bottle of wine,” continued the Bartender, “to use something as disrespectful and sacrilegious as some sort of corkscrew. I find these work so much better in helping to … extract … the contents of a bottle. Wouldn’t you agree, m’lord?”
Scarcely pausing a moment, he plunged the prongs into the neck, at the sides of the cork. Carven felt a shiver run up and down along his spine … the same one he felt in similar situations when it was he doing the … no, no. This was a time to hide and contemplate, not for his own personal hunting, and such was not permitted within the pub in any event.
The cork slid deftly out with barely the hint of a “pop” as it was released by the bottle. Resting the bottle on the countertop in front of him, the Bartender removed it from the puller and waved it gently in front of his own nose. “Mmm… Such a wonderful aroma. I believe this was crafted and aged perfectly.” He offered the cork to Carven, but the slightest twist of the man’s head was sufficient to be understood as rejection.
“I have never had you offer nor serve me anything repellant. Given the length of my patronage, I believe I shall simply trust you on this one.”
“Very good, m’lord. Would you care to taste a small sample before returning to your table?”
By this point, the faint fumes from the bottle had already reached his nostrils and he could feel just the hint of a flush begin to touch his cheeks. He wanted nothing more than to sit with this bottle and pour himself a full glass, so he again twitched his head to decline.
The bottle was placed atop the bar and the Bartender retrieved a fresh glass, giving it a quick swipe with his ever-present towel. “Then here is a fresh glass. Please enjoy the bottle. If you are particularly fond of it, I am certain we will have it in stock for quite some time.”
Since Carven could not recall any circumstance under which the pub had not had any particular beverage in stock, this, again, was of no surprise to him. It was, after all, just one more of those peculiar idiosyncrasies of the Nowhere Pub.
# # #
What is the Nowhere Pub? It is a multi-dimensional, cross time and space, pub. To visualize it, first attempt to conjure from the deepest recesses of your mind the darkest, seemingly most unfriendly, pub which exudes a sense that you do not belong here. Now magnify that several times. You might just begin to come close to the interior of the Pub. There are tables scattered across the floor and around the edges of the room — which is barely visible. Centered on each table is a small flickering light which, at a cursory glance, might seem to be a candle — but is not.
Similarly, there are lights suspended over the bar. Behind the bar are several taps for beer and ale — all unlabeled and having merely blank pull-levers, made of wood or some other odd material, attached to them. There’s a multitude of bottles against the back wall, either similarly unlabeled or with labels that are impossible to see or read. Of course, the Pub has a bartender. He’s usually a cheerful sort and, when not serving drinks, spends most of his time polishing the glasses and mugs.
What’s the allure of the Pub? It has quite a few.
For one thing, any drink that exists — somewhere or somewhen — is available to you. Name a beer, and they’ve not only got it, but it’s on tap. Care for some wine instead? There’s a multitude of bottles available — only the very best years, of course. Pick a vintage liquor, and they’ll have a bottle — open and waiting to serve you a shot. If you insist on a cocktail, hardly a favorite of the usual clientele, the bartender will have just the perfect ingredients for the absolutely best version of it you’ve ever tasted.
And the clientele — Ah, you’ll find all sorts here; ranging from barbarians just walked in out of icy tundra, to nomadic priests finally made it out of the desert, all the way to space marine officers who’ve come out of a successful battle. This is where they go to have a drink, or five, and relax.
The Pub is where a wide variety of customers meet and stories are swapped. Just don’t try to start a fight. You’ll get one warning from the Bartender that behaving in such a manner will require him to call the Bouncer to put an end to it. That always settles the point.
Oh, and the other distinction about the Pub? It’s got two kinds of customers. The Regulars and the One-Timers. You don’t know which one you are until you try and find the Pub again. The Regulars can always find their way back. The door they open to leave the pub will always be the same door they used to enter it — returning them back to wherever, and whenever, they came from.
As for the One-Timers? Well — they get one chance. No one else uses that door? They’re headed back home and never finding it again. They go out through a door someone else has opened, though, and who knows where they’re headed or if they’re ever coming back.
How do you figure out which type of customer you are? You walk out the door and see what happens. Or, you discover you can find the Pub again.
Somehow, though, the Pub is always good at bringing the right people together, some times over and over again. Because, after all, when what you really need is a fellow traveller in the midst of their own personal darkness to have a shared drink with, there’s no better place for that than your favorite pub, right?
# # #
The man took the offered glass and the bottle and returned to his alcove, placing both on the table before seating himself once again. With an almost innocent hesitation, he slowly began to pour. The dark red liquid was slightly thicker than a typical wine, most likely due to the “enhancement” during the crushing process. The scent wafting from the surface of the wine in his glass was alluring, reminding him of so many of those he had wooed, and won, throughout his long existence.
Lifting the glass by its stem, he brought it to his lips and took the tiniest of sips, the wine barely touching his lips. Feeling the wine brush past his fangs and linger on his tongue, he suddenly recalled a memory from shortly after he had first been turned. “Ahhh… Rebecca, my darling,” escaped in a whisper.
Mentally catching himself at the unexpected recollection, he took a heartier mouthful from the glass and returned it to the table. He discovered, much to his surprise, that a tear had formed just at the corner of one eye. This, too, was unexpected, as it had been at least several decades since he’d felt he had anything to feel grief about. He tugged his small kerchief from the other vest pocket opposite his watch and touched it to the tear, letting it be absorbed and vanish.
He stared for a moment at the invisible spot of moistened fabric. The piece of cloth was more typically used for dabbing at the edges of his mouth following when he dined, so it was quite rare for it to see any liquid which was not red.
Tucking the kerchief away, he filled his glass once more and decided to drink more leisurely so he could fully savor the taste of the wine. He had, after all, quite some time to occupy until it was safe to return home, and he wanted neither a third bottle nor to waste the one sitting in front of him
Thus he sat for quite some time … contemplating the flickering light, the slowly draining wine bottle, his glass, and, of course, his own continued existence.
# # #
A bit over half of this second bottle had been poured and consumed when he heard the soft sound of the door to the outside of the Pub opening. While he knew there was nothing to fear inside the Pub, the instincts of one who is simultaneously predator and prey are impossible to set aside. From the bar, he heard the Bartender give one of his typically welcoming greetings, followed by the short conversation afterwards.
“Eoghann MacShimidh! Do me eyes deceive me? Fàilte! In for a pint, good sir?” The Bartender had slipped into a somewhat more boisterous mood for reasons known only to him.
The newcomer stepped to the bar and removed his beret, before taking a seat.
“Probably more than a pint. Didna’ feel like lockin’ me’self up in a cage tonight.”
“Same as last time, perhaps? That was a Lonely Wolf Stout, if memory serves?”
“I ’spect I’ll be here for a few hours, though. Don’t want to start snoring at the bar. Maybe something a bit lighter to start?”
“Ah. I’ve got just the thing for you, then.” The Bartender lifted a mug from the counter and polished it with his towel before stepping over to the taps. He selected one seemingly at random and pulled the arm, letting a warm-looking ale pour down the side of the glass mug, slowly filling it. With a perfect amount filled and just the right amount of a foam head, he placed the mug on the bar.
“Here you go, a Waning Moon brown ale. I think you’ll enjoy it.”
“Waning moon, eh? Aye, that is something I be lookin’ for’ard to.” Eoghann grabbed the handle and took a taste, the foam slightly decorating the tips of his short but bushy mustache. “Ahhh… that is a good one. Yeah, I expect I’ll be downing a few of these tonight while I wait.”
The Bartender smiled and slightly tipped his head towards the secluded alcove where the other man sat, alone, with his wineglass and bottle of wine.
“If you are, indeed, here for a bit of a stay, there’s another one in here, who’s … ah … hiding from a wider world.” He continued in a softer voice, “And for much the same reasons, too.”
Twisting in his seat, the two men looked at each other and a smile crossed the new man’s face in recognition. He tucked his beret under his arm and slid off the barstool. “Aye. I’ll be going to have some drinks with his’self, then. I’ll be back when I need a refill.”
# # #
Carven used his foot to push a second chair back from the table, granting a seat to the other man. Eoghann placed the mug on the table, followed by his beret next to it before taking the offered chair and sitting down.
“So we’re both here hiding from what can hurt us, eh, Your Lordship?”
“Oh, stop that. We both know my title comes from somewhere you’ve never heard of and probably wouldn’t even be able to visit unless you went with me. And, from any of what you’ve ever told me, I doubt you even have Marquesses there.”
“This is true. But, then again, I am very certain I wouldn’t want to go where you’re from. I have enough hardship with just the one moon to cause me misery when it’s full. You’ve got two of the damned things. I really don’t want to even think what those would do to me.”
“Fair point. However, I suspect my need to shelter from a sun’s light would remain, no matter where I may be. I fear it is only at home nestled away in my personal chambers, or here,” gesturing with his glass to the pub around them, “within these walls I might feel safe from any such light. And, thus, I come here at times to give myself the … illusion … of a more normal existence, I suppose.”
Eoghann chuckled. “First time I’ve ever heard anything within this place referred to as ‘normal’.” He took a long drank from his mug. “P’raps surprisingly, t’is the same reason I come here. Out there,” waving his free hand towards the outer door of the Pub, “the moon is full and high, spreading far too much light on the land. Were I at home, I would have needed to chain myself up to keep those I know, and love, safe … from me.”
He wrapped both hands around the mug and stared into the dark liquid somberly. “Aye, I heal from most wounds… but only of the physical sort. I can’t trust the … him … to not take advantage of the suffering I can inflict on others, wounding myself in the process.”
Carven picked up his glass and studied it for a second, saying softly, “At least you have the excuse of a crazed other to blame. I have only myself.” He drank slowly from the glass in an attempt to smother the thought.
# # #
After spending much time in silence together, slowly drinking their respective beverages, the man simply contemplating his existence looked up and softly asked, “How long has it been?”
“Been what? That we’ve known each other?”
“No. How long since … you were changed?”
“Oh. That.” Eoghann stared into his mug. “Maybe twenty … thirty … years, I think? And almost every single month of that time has seen me need to deal with the … changing.” A soft shudder rippled through the man’s body and he quickly finished what remained of his first mug of ale. Abruptly, he pushed his chair back, then stood and solemnly walked back to the Bartender to request a refill.
While he was away, Carven slowly sipped at his wine, still deep in thought. When the other man returned and again seated himself, Carven asked, “So that’s twenty or thirty years, during which you’ve not been able to bear the full light of the moon?”
“Aye. ’Tis a curse for me, as the moon used to be special for me. I still fondly remember taking my beloved to the lakeside on a moon-filled night … and seeing the light glistening in her eyes. T’was the first night we kissed…” A soft smile spread across his face in remembrance. “But, thankfully, not the last.”
“For me, the full light of the moons is the brightest I am ever able to experience the world. I try to remember what everything looked like, wrapped in a warm golden glow … and find myself unable to do so.”
A lengthy pause while both men contemplated their personal histories and even more personal curses. Eventually, Carven broke the silence.
“Do you ever miss it? The moon, I mean? Do you miss that moon light and what it meant to you?”
A quick sharp breath, then a very controlled and slow exhalation. “At times, aye. I hate what I find as the results of a night when I’ve Changed. But I’m not …. me … under the moon’s light. It’s a different moon and it’s harsh now … angrier. So I’d rather keep myself locked up — chained. He doesn’t understand locks and keys, so it’s the only way to keep everyone safe.” A pause, then almost in a whisper, “Even myself.”
A long drink from the man’s second mug followed by, “And you, my friend? I suspect I know the answer, but … do you miss the sun?”
Even though he’d prompted this, and started down the path, he hadn’t considered where it would lead, so Carven found himself surprised by his own reaction to what should have been an expected question. For a man who had not been shocked in several lifetimes, the tears forming at the corners of both eyes were still unexpected. He attempted to hide this by picking up his wine glass and answering softly, his words barely audible across the small table.
“Do I miss the sun? Only every single day of my continued existence.”

Hello there!
​
Thanks for taking the time to read my post. I'm a 38-year-old programmer from a small town in the Netherlands. I've tried this before and had some nice conversations, but in the end it didn't work out so I'm back to give this another try.
​
When I'm not working, I love reading fantasy books, collecting books, playing video games on my PC, and going on long walks in nature. I'm also fascinated by ancient cultures and mythology, which is why I enjoy traveling to see ancient sites in person.
I'm an introvert (INTJ) who loves pets, but I don't currently have any. I'm also childfree and left-leaning politically. I've been doing volunteer work for over 20 years, and I'm an atheist. Plus, I don't smoke, drink alcohol, or do drugs.
I'll admit, I'm not the best at small talk, but I make up for it by being a great listener and advice giver. I've been told that I have a funny but dry sense of humor. Although I struggle with dysthymia, it's not enough to keep me from functioning in my day-to-day life.
I'm working on my weight and getting to a healthy level again, but I'm not there yet. I also don't enjoy going out to bars, clubs, or partying, but I do enjoy going out to eat at a restaurant or going to a concert.
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What am I looking for? Well, I'm looking for a serious monogamous relationship with someone who shares some of my interests and hobbies. I'm looking for someone who is intelligent, childfree, left-leaning politically, and below 40 (roughly). Most importantly, I'm looking for someone who will accept me for who I am, flaws and all.
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So if you're someone who puts as much effort into having and keeping up a conversation as I do, and you believe that we could make each other's lives better by being together, I'd love to hear from you. Let's get to know each other and see where things go.

No offense, hey howdy, and thank you all so much for being here and contributing!
My history with the Dx of my deficiency is a lot like the experiences I read on here every day.
I was in the full-blown neurological stage (even spent a day in a wheelchair not able to roll on my own steam), and have been since late last September. Onset is unknown, but we can look back and see that the signs of earlier stages were missed over and over again, as I’ve basically spent the last five years (and particularly the last year) in doctors offices.
I am not surprised at all by the number of doctors who do not listen to their patients, but I was blown away to learn how little effort doctors and medical universities put into nutrition modules/requirements especially this particular component, which is so essential to living as a functional human being.
With every generation getting progressively, vegan and vegetarian, I cringe at the completely foreseeable, heavily destructive epidemic that seems to nearly be upon us.
Is my B12 brain blowing this out of proportion? Order some of you out there worry that entire generations may be lost to this issue, especially after so many people getting hit by Covid along the way.
TG for Dr. Chandry and a number of other books and studies out there, but I feel lucky that I am even able to comprehend them anymore.
I would give anything to find a Dr. Chandry in my area, but I guess there’s not enough money/glory in such a specialty.
TBH, I can’t even find a Doctor Who can talk to me without telling me that I don’t have anemia (so don’t need treatment), and/or that they want to test my levels, while I am still in replacement therapy via IMs.
It’s so maddening! I bring very solid materials to my visits, only to have them brushed aside.
The doctor who is currently prescribing my vitamin (why we need a prescription for a vitamin with no UL is a bananas question in itself), seems to be doing so out of some sort of pandering, and I’m terrified, because I am a long way from sorted out.
I’m almost 6 months into treatment, and I think I’m still in denial because this is one of the only places I can come where this is not treated like a psychiatric disorder…

Is the Highest Rate of Pay for Ops managers still 29/hr or did they raise it at all this year?

Not sure if this is the right forum, but would love any shared stories…
Last month we transferred one of my top graded PGT normal embryos. We got a positive pregnancy test, but at the 6 and 7 week ultrasound the heartbeat was super low (like 60 bpm) and a couple days ago at 7 weeks the doctor told me it’s measuring a week behind, starting to disintegrate, and a loss is inevitable. At this point I don’t know why it didn’t work out, but she did say there’s a 1% potential error rate with Igenomix testing, and this embryo could have been undetected aneuploid. The only way I get to find out is collecting the miscarriage and sending it in :(
Has anyone had this happen to them? Or also dealt with a low heart beat but discovered it was for other reasons? Or went on to have a successful second FET after this situation with the first?
For additional background, this is my first FET, and we’re doing IVF for lean PCOS and blocked tubes.
Thanks so much for your words, this is heartbreaking.

TW for mentions of violence, abandonment, hospitals, and underage sexual alters
Sorry if I mess up the spelling or wording on this, I've got someone helping me out cuz writing and typing is hard. Anyways.
There's kind of this thing going on with someone in the partner system and one of our caregivers in our own system. It's the main caregiver of the system and pretty much every little plus all the teenagers (including me) call it mom and see it as a genuine maternal figure. I definitely view it as my mom.
This specific caregiver has a nasty history of destructive and dangerous behaviours that it would engage in to keep us "safe." It's had a long long history of not trusting anyone and refusing to get attached to people due to betrayals and abandonment. It's partner came along over a year ago and although they got together purely for financial and survival reasons, it ended up genuinely falling in love with him (platonically, but seriously stronger than I've seen most romantic relationships). It took a long time and a lot of reassurance that he wouldn't leave, that it was only afraid because of past experiences, etc. It refused to believe him for over a year before it finally begun to truly accept that he wasn't going anywhere.
Then he left.
The littles don't know. They've had false memories put in place so that they won't figure it out and get upset. The kids are it's top priority. The only reason I figured it out is because I'm older and I noticed a lot with mom that it was more distant and quiet and it was always waiting and keeping an eye out for him. Usually it would spend time with him, then focus entirely on inside jobs, rinse and repeat but even after "meeting" him it didn't change its attitude and kept waiting. Even after it had already given up it kept waiting. That's what upsets me the most. It waited for him even though it had decided he wouldn't come back. I feel sick just typing it out.
He came back after a couple of months but it's not the same. It doesn't trust him anymore. It can't believe a word he says. Last time, it didn't trust that he'd stay, but it was getting there. It was starting to believe it. Now it's like no matter what anyone does it can't bring itself to. Not only that, but it's lost all trust in any of the other promises he made because he broke that one. I know it wasn't his fault, and he had his own reasons mentally for closing himself off, but it breaks my heart seeing my mum constantly struggling between letting him back in or pushing him away. The only reason it's not reverted right back to persecutory behaviours is because it doesn't want to shred the connections that the other alters have with friends and partners, or hurt the littles by taking away people who bring them comfort.
We also have four very young sexual protectors, one of whom specifically formed in order to oversexualize ourself in the hopes that it'd prevent partners from cheating on us or leaving us. Another formed to do anything she's told without question, again, for the same reason of making sure we aren't abandoned. They had been doing so well at healing but now they've reverted right back to square one and it breaks my heart seeing these kids act out over something they can't control in ways that they shouldn't have ever known. So many of the kids view mums partner as a father figure and it trusted him and cared for him enough to allow him to take on a paternal role.
I don't want to go to the hospital. I don't want to go through another near death experience. I don't want my mum to start spiralling into violence and isolation. I don't want to lose our sober streak. I don't want to disappear. I don't want to lose people I care about. I don't want the others to lose their friends and partners. I don't want to see him again. I don't want my mum to have to lose him when he's trying so hard to make up for it. I don't want him to try. I want to hate him and I want him to make it easy. I want all of this to go away. I want my mum to yell at him or cry at him or just do SOMETHING instead of sitting there numb and expressionless and then letting him back in so easily. I don't want him in my family. I want to tell the others. I don't want them to get hurt. I want to be angry. I don't want to upset my mum.
-D

I have always been one of the shy , introvert people , when it comes to love ! I wanted a stable and a happy relationship , and after my first breakup which happened two years ago , I was shattered ! It was my first love , so it hurted me a lot !
I met this new girl X , who I started having conversations with ! Eventually we both connected a lot on different things and now she is my bestfriend ! I HAVE FALLEN FOR HER , I know that completely , and she WAS that kind of a person , who always showed like she wanted a romantic , stable relationship.
We both talk with each other everyday , have supported each other through depression , she has been there for me in one life changing accident where I couldn't walk , she wakes me up every morning and we both always help each other out with our emotional barrier !
IMPORTANT MAIN PART : Now she tells me , she doesn't wants anything like a serious relationship for the next 3-4 years , she wants to hookup with different men , have casual relationships of 2-3 months , meet different people , makeout with different ones , live her teenage through parties and hookups ! She won't accept any serious proposal right now as well.
And this thought is FUCKING ME UP , because I always wanted a serious relationship with her ! THE THOUGHT THAT SHE WILL MAKEOUT WITH RANDOM MEN , THAT SOMEONE ELSE WILL BE HER FIRST KISS , AND I WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO BE ANYTHING ROMANTIC TO HER , ONLY A BESTFRIEND IS HURTING ME A LOT.
I just don't know anything at this point !
MAN I LOVED THIS WOMAN AND HER SHOWING THIS SIDE , IS JUST DISTURBING !
Please, Please , Just help me out , I just don't know anything at this point !

I'm a first-year teacher in Vermont. I was unable to find remotely affordable housing in the town I teach in, so I commute almost an hour each way every day. Between the pay rate for a new teacher, car payments, gas, utilities, and my rent, I have been absolutely hemorrhaging money this entire year. I am married and my wife works full-time. We don't have kids, nor do we have significant college debt. We make too much money to afford help with our internet/heat/rent.
I keep crunching the numbers, and I don't see how we are ever going to be able to go from living paycheck-paycheck and gradually increasing our credit card debt in order to live, let alone to try to improve our situations or afford a down payment (ha!) to lower our housing costs.
I really, really love this job. The kids are awesome, my coworkers are inspiring and passionate, the culture is great, and the work is challenging and rewarding. I just do not see how it is possible for me to live like this without any hope of improving our conditions. The options I can see are to either get a second job (and lose even more of the very limited time I have to be with my wife), start working on a Masters to slightly raise my pay, quit and go back to higher-paying but soul-crushing work in the service industry, or find a way to get killed so my wife can get an insurance payout (mostly joking). I'm already drowning in the work of just being a teacher - I've lost weight, my sleep is a mess, and my marriage is going through a really rough patch. I truly believe in the value and necessity of education, but I feel like participating in the education system is just completely fucking myself over and over again.
How do you make it all work? Does it ever get better? I'm really feeling overwhelmed and defeated right now.

I had last posted about feeling suicidal a few days ago. Immediately I knew I needed to take action and I was. I was on a plane to Umrah. As soon as I landed I felt numb and realized my intention was not for the right purpose. I went straight to the hotel, took my ihraam off and fell asleep.
I realized my life has much bigger issues than I fathomed. I hoped doing umraah in Ramadan would help me gain perspective, atone for all my sins, help me get over my past and become a newer and improved person but my heart and Allah do not want that. I don't know what to do right now. I am sitting in my hotel, looking at the the harmain and asking Allah where did I go wrong.
I hurt so many people, from when I was a child to recently. I made people scared, fearful, threatened, and ruined their lives. I am scum and a parasite. People who know me, including people on this sub will affirm that. When I talk to them, they immediately run away when they find out who I am. I was just recently brought to light about the issues I have and suffer. For me, there is no cure. No amount of hajj, umrah, prayer, medicine, therapy, new relationships, etc. will cure me. For me there is instant death or living life in decay and I would not want to die anywhere else but here, in the house of Allah.
I did this all to myself. I chose to be a cheater, liar, manipulator, cancer, and what ever else I have been labeled. I had a prize with me, an angel 6 months ago, but I had to let it go because there was too much animosity and pain. I let that individual go because I know they deserved better and they are. But in the recent month or so I hurt that person too. I just keep hurting people and not recognizing the pain.
I decided to give my umrah one more go. I am going to the meeqat, and am going to sincerely repent, ask Allah for forgiveness, atone once more and see where I end up. Unfortunately I put too much stock into what other people think and I do not focus on myself. Despite being labelled all these type of issues, which I may or may not possess, or may have some traits of, I do not want to be this person anymore. I want to be a productive, viable and worthy individual who has something positive to offer. I know I have potential, and I am trying my best to tap into that. However, I am also in the camp that some people never change. They always have that fitnah in them to do harm. Once a "x" always and "x" and x can be anything from cheater, liar, abuser, or psycho.
Again, for anyone I hurt, whether here, or society at large, or in my family, or colleagues, I sincerely apologize. Obviously I haven't changed because being in my age range, I should have by now. If this umrah, in this sacred month does not change me, I am 100% willing to accept that this dunya is not for me, and I am not worthy of it.

whats the avg rate per gram of strains like OG kush, Amnesia Haze, Northern Lights, in ncr and other metros

Hi, I’m a new driver 23F (2years, class 5 gdl) and trying to get insurance on my 2017 hyundai Elantra se 4dr. I do not have previous insurance experience and am financing the car (since last year). I have been trying to get insurance and have been quoted by a couple of companies but the rates are in the 700’s a month. Our previous insurance was under my brothers name and was around 300/ month but due to his negligence it got cancelled. The car is under my name and he is also on the agreement. My immediate family have bad credit and insurance history so won’t be able to help me with this. Does anyone have any recommendations on what I can do, and what companies have better rates. I’ve tried intact and Belair direct so far. TD isn’t an option as that’s what we were on before. Any advice would be appreciated.